Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Jeremy from Big Brother

(Restart Story)

Being a huge fan of the television show big brother, you watched it all summer before classes started. You happened to take a particular liking to Jeremy, a cocky member of the show who often said he would “enter beast mode” upon starting a competition. Channeling your inner Jeremy, you shout “BEAST MODE ON!” and leap from out under your desk. The rest of the class looks at you with puzzled expressions on their faces, with quite a few snickering at your display. Fortunately for you, Rick and Colin were caught off guard by your antics, giving you an opening to attack. With one perfectly executed backwards sweeping roundhouse kick, you nail both of them in the face, knocking them to the ground dazed and confused. Being the larger of the two, you decide to subdue Rick first. Before he is even able to recover from your initial kick, you drive two forceful punches into his face, causing him to go unconscious. By now Colin has managed to stand up, and looks upon you with amazement and fear. He tries to punch you several times, but your training allows you to dodge and block his blows as proficiently as Neo at the end of the Matrix. Finally, you grab one of his arms as he extends it to attempt a punch, pull him in, and knee him in the chest. Then, using your other hand, you punch him several times in the face, finishing with an uppercut that causes him to fly back several feet and land on the top of another student’s desk. Your work done, you stand triumphantly over your defeated foes. As you stand there in a victory pose, Mr. Anderson comes back into the classroom in a rush, followed by several students who had left during your martial arts display to inform him of your assault. He takes you away to the Principal’s office immediately. Unfortunately for you, Rick and Colin’ parents all happen to be involved in the justice system in some fashion, and so you are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law and then some. By the time you are released from prison, you are nearing middle age and have no decent prospects in life. Try again?

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